Just about 5 minutes ago...

      Just about 5 minutes ago I was outside, I held up my can of Mountain Dew to the light and asked my neighbor what it looked like I was drinking. He said "BEER!" Proof that I have satellites for sale. If you know someone that suffers from mercury poisoning I have what they need to be rejuvenated. I have a satellite. I have also been poisoned with mercury at a local hospital. The satellite is fiber optic and can project just like they did to Tupac on stage with Snoop Dog (Lion.) These things cost approximately $30,000,000. I'm selling one for $500,000. Cashiers Checks only from European, American, Or certain parts of Cental and South America or Asia. If I die during the transaction the satellites float away. If the money doesn't come through the satellites float away. Anyone want to buy a satellite? I try to be honest in all my dealings and I hope that the controllers of the satellite are equally honest. The batteries are charged regularly. It should provide a decent lifespan.

I can't make this stuff up!